Tuesday, September 30, 2008

The Move

As the uncertainty of his move starts to set in, I start realizing how much I am going to miss him. Let me digress a minute and give the background.
A few weeks ago he come over with the sad puppy dog face and couldn’t look me in the eye. Due to my history, I was thinking he was going to tell me his just didn’t feel that way for me, or he found someone else, or something else horrible. So when he told me that work was moving him back to DC, I was actually relieved. That is until I realized what this meant. The worst part in all of this is that they have told him it will happen, just not a specific date. So I am doing the practical thing and thinking that when they tell him we will then have 30 days till he has to be there. Really, every day that passes without news is one more day we get together.
Well we started off being super sweet to each other because we both knew that being asses to each other was a waste of our limited time. However, as weeks go by without news, we are starting to fall back into our old routine. (side note, I am in the office babysitting a class and I SWEAR someone is snoring in the class!!)
The stress of all of the move, major issues at work, school, and the battle I face in my house, is starting to wear on me and I wish I wouldn’t take it out on him. He is nothing but the best to me. He takes care of me, worries about me, makes fun of me, understands my crazy world and generally is the best thing I have ever had happen to me….so why do I take it all for granted way too often?
Ah well, knowing you do it is half the battle I suppose.

Saturday, September 27, 2008

Does it come back to hant you?

In this day of MySpace, Facebook, blogs, and every Joe having their own website, does what you post online come back to haunt you?

Sure, we have all heard of the girls who posted pictures on their website of their wild Spring Break trip, thier audition on Girls Gone Wild, their forays into girl on girl action, but what about those of us who use our blogs as a place to let off some steam, to bitch about things that bug us but that we keep in?

I am sitting here wondering this because I need to find a creative outlet for all of this crap in my life. I need to be able to vent freely and without worry that my boyfriend will roll his eyes at hearing the crap that is my job over and over. I don’t want suggestions on how to fix it because I fix it by bitching (although, I love to hear them when they aren’t what I always hear), I just need a place to yell I guess. I stopped yelling in the car when other drives look at me scared out of their minds.

I want to use my blog to open up and vent, but I really am worried about it coming back to haunt me on job interviews and as I move up the ladder of my career. I do very well at keeping anything that would identify me out of my blog so I guess that is a good thing.

One of the blogs that I read on a daily basis is from a woman who just got a job at a great place. It really sounds like she is moving up in the world. When I read the personal parts of her life though I cringe. Not that anything is really bad, she lives a life kind of like me but I worry for her that in the future her blog will bite her.

I guess I will press my luck and do it. I will still try very hard to keep any identifying marks and features out of my blog. I will be like a blogging super hero!! Dedicated company girl by day, bitchy girl by night. Oh, maybe I will get this cult following of blog readers, or my blog will become main stream and people will use it as water cooler talk. Ok, maybe I will just be a little less stressed at the morons I meet on a daily basis.