Thursday, October 30, 2008

Becoming "single" again

No, we didn't break up. I am just going through the emotions before he leaves. Right now my self sufficient personality is coming back in force. As the days get closer to this minor, two year change in living arrangements, I am starting to get very worried. This in turn is making me get very defensive, in all honestly mean to him. I don't want to be, but I can't stop my reactions to things. I am sitting here and he might crack a joke that I normally would laugh at but I just look at him with that blank stare.

Another thing I am noticing is that I used to love to cook for him. It was normal for me to cook for both of us every day and look forward to it. Now, I don't want to cook. I want to do what I like to call the "Single snack". It is what I did when I lived alone and single. No real meal, just snacking. I want to cook for him but I don't feel like I have the energy.

I know this is a funk I need to get out of but I really hope it goes away before he does.

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