Wednesday, September 2, 2009

The Way Out

I am so excited!! If I could get over my headache, I know I would really be excited but right now I will take what I have.

I am not ready to post about my plans, but I have a way out of the boring crap I currently do. It will take a while but it will be a good goal to work towards I am sure. Yes, it will mean more school but it will be finally studying something I am passionate about.

I started my MBA to fulfill a goal I set for myself. It will serve the purpose of literally feeding me so a while and helping me to build a savings that I am going to need. But the MBA isn't feeding my soul. I sit at school and in the discussion boards of my online classes and I see and read people having conversations about business and being passionate about it. I have never felt that way. I don't want to sit around and discuss business strategy, marketing methods, great business leaders, project management, financial standards and all that jazz. I want to go to school, do my work and not think about it.

I have found myself feeling that way about my work as well. Sure, I care that my business is successful. If it wasn't I wouldn't be getting paid or have a job. But I see the passion that my boss and co-workers put into it and I just don't have it. I try to feel it and it just upsets me, the BS that happens isn't fun for me, it knocks me down and sometimes physically pains me. I just hate the corporate world. There I said it. I can try all I want, but it just doesn't feed my soul anymore.

I look at people and envy those that can make a living in their passion. I have always wanted that but I could never figure out what my passion was. I have things I like to do, but really, they are not what I live for. Thinking about this, I started (actually on vacation) trying to ask myself if I could do ANYTHING what would it be? If I could work ANYWHERE where what type of environment would it be. I also thought of all the other things I have thought I would like to do and thought about the pros and the cons of them and what I would like and what I wouldn't. A huge theme came out in them all. I found the thing that made me excited and happy and that I could spend hours on.

For the first time, I feel like I am doing what I want and living up to my own expectations. I finally feel like I have the confidence not to follow other people's dreams for me and live up to their expectations about what I should be doing with my life and it feel REALLY good.

No comments:

Post a Comment