Sunday, January 31, 2010

Weekly Menu

That whole Wednesday to Wednesday thing I was going to do?  Yea, not gonna happen.  I had to face the music that I was not and did not want to be that freakishly prepared person.  I owned up to the that fact that I am lazy, I procrastinate, and I work my ass off all day and don't want to come home and cook for 2 hours.  So instead I have been cooking ALL day today and have most of the food for next week done!  All I have to do is come home, reheat and eat.  Bonus, I will also be more likely to keep to the menu.  No more planting my self in front of the fridge with a fork and just eating whatever looks good.

Sunday:  Spicy Meatloaf (recipe here), mashed potatoes, and green peas.  I modified the recipe to make it with ground buffalo (yep, you read it right).  I realized that there was no red meat in the menu and well that's just not right! Already cooked and will freeze some of it.

Monday:  Grilled Tilapia and Polenta with salad. (recipe here)

Tuesday: BBQ Chicken and leftover polenta (recipe here). Cooking this Sunday night.

Wednesday: Shrimp Chili Cornbread Casserole.  Cooking as I type. will freeze part of it.

Thursday: Left over night

Friday: pizza!!  (recipe where else but Cooking Light, just don't remember the name.  It's in the October '09 issue)

Saturday, January 30, 2010

Wanted: New Peeps

Let me preface this post by saying that I love my friends.  They are amazing and I couldn't get through life without them.  They rock my world.

That said, sometimes I feel out of sorts when I spend time around them in a group.  I am the token cynical, sarcastic single chick of the bunch.  We went today for dress fitting and lunch and I couldn't follow the conversation and my dirty little admission....I didn't care to!!!

Weddings, not a problem.  I love them I love looking at them and thinking about them but lately due to other things, I am not in the mood to think about them.  It is too close to "Make the single people uncomfortable" day for me to go there.  Then the lunch conversation, ovulation and baby making!  AAAHHH, what the crap I'm melting!!!!  That is about how I felt.  Nothing makes a girl who is unsure if she even wants little brats more ready to go rape the closest acceptable guy to procreate then thinking she is running out of time.  I don't think about kids, I don't stress over it...until someone reminds me I am getting closer and closer to 40.  No, I am not there by a long shot but when you start adding in the time to find someone, do the dating game, pop the question, plan a kick ass wedding and party, spend some time as a married couple, and then spend 9 months baking a poop machine, it adds up. Folks, we are talking 37 here.  I know I know, not a big deal...but it still gets to you. 

So how does all this fit with the title of this post?  I need a new peeps to add to the mix.  I need single, or already married people who are NOT building life on procreating and talking about procreating.  People who have lives outside of the burbs.  Must like to go experience new places and restaurants with groups of people.  Must be able to fit in with old peeps while not getting brainwashed. 


Rant over.

Friday, January 29, 2010

Fighting the Funk Round 2

It is imperative that I get a gym membership sooner rather than later. I am a wuss and hate to work out outside.  As a result I am in the house and getting back into a rather pissy mood. 

I need to get in a better mood period.  I can pinpoint my moods to 3 main things.  Unforutnately due to the nature of them, I can't write about them here so I can't get it out.  I know I need to get out the pen and paper and start writing.  That might be the next stop tonight. 

So in attempts to get me in a better mood, I shall post a few of the pretties I have found online today that I wish I could surround myself with.  Yes, because I am that damn vain right now.  :)

My kitchen could use a blue break with this lovely.
From: Sur La Table 

For my feet (these would so be in my closet if I had a steady check coming in)
 
Neiman Marcus

I could handle these as my Valentine; I mean at times shoes are better than a man right?  :)

Barneys
 
A few weeks here would be just what I need to get over the funk.
 
 
Santorini, Image here
 

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Weekly Menu and other useless crap

A month of being good and I am craving junk.  Willpower has been good so far but it is getting harder and harder.   I think I am going to have to find a way to make junk food at the house to fix the craving.

I had to drive to hell today and the minute I headed that way, my body tensed up and my eye started twitching.  At first I thought the twitching was due to driving the boss' EXTREMELY expensive new car on 635 (never my favorite highway).  But the twitch didn't stop until we drove away.   I didn't realize how out of hell I was until he started talking about the latest gossip going on and I had no clue what he was talking about.  I just laughed and said not really interested in hearing about it. 

The dinner menu this week is something I am honestly not sure of.  It's my first week back to a normal routine and it is going to take a little more for me to stick with the program.  I'm making it easy to remember where the recipes are this time...I'm using just one cook book (minus the chicken which was from an early weekly menu and is  making a repeat for the freezer).  I also don't have much I need to get in terms of groceries so a lot of these recipes will have me buying the staples I am out of.

Wednesday:  Dinner at C's.
Thursday: Tuna melt and baked fries
Friday: Girl's night out
Saturday: Meatloaf, mashed potatoes
Sunday: BBQ Chicken (to freeze)
Monday: Pork chops
Tuesday: Chilaquiles Casserole

Monday, January 25, 2010

Welcome to Funky Town

And no, we aren't talking the head bopping groovy thing. We are talking the junky funk. Sure, it was a good day all said, but I got in a funk last night and it stayed around today.

I didn't want to do my 3 miles today but I made myself and hated every minute of it. Strange since I usually love it.  Of course, I also have some pretty major things on my mind.  My grandmother has stage 4 bile duct cancer.  She has been having blood clots in her legs and mild strokes lately.  She is heading down hill fast (we are talking probably a week or so at the very most). So even though we aren't that close, it gets to me.  And it brings me back to when I lost my other grandmother.  At that time PK was in the picture and was there for me.  PK turned out to be an ass who has his own crazy ass baggage now.  It just brings back a whole bunch of hurt right now. 

On the bright side, it was good to be in an office today.  It was good to be around women in an office today. I am actually looking forward to going back tomorrow and getting some stuff done.  I am actually looking forward to being able to decorate a new office and make it my own.  More so, I am looking forward to taking a new job and making it my own.  New tasks, new hurdles to cross, new challenges to overcome and I am looking forward to it.

The best part about being in an office.....being able to wear my cute clothes again!!!  My boss actually said that I looked very nice today and professional.  The only issue I think I am going to run into is that I am going to run out of options.  I just have to make it one month and then I will be able to go and get a few more staples (more pants and skirts).  Hopefully by then I will be down a size too.  See I know it isn't the end of month post and I don't want to jinx myself but this month I have lost 7 pounds.  3 pound ahead of where I wanted to be.  I will be keeping this up and I really hope that the when I can go shopping again that I can take my clothes and get them altered and get new ones!  We shall see. 

Sunday, January 24, 2010

Left over Quiche

I made this quiche using up the leftover cooked veggies that were in the fridge. I also added up a little of the sausage that I was about to cut up and freeze.  It was a great meal that I honestly wasn't expecting it to be.  Add with a salad and I had a great dinner that is going to give me dinner and lunch for a few more days.

Kitchen Sink Quiche

Short cut - pre-made 9" deep dish pie crust, blinded baked

Basic starter filling:3 eggs
1 cup fat free evaporated milk
1 cut fat free milk
1/3 cup cheese (I used a block of pepper jack that needed to be used up)
nutmeg to taste
salt to taste
pepper to taste

Ideas to add:
I added fresh sauteed spinach, left over potatoes and carrots from my pot roast, sauteed onions, minced garlic, crumbled breakfast sausage.

Blind baked the pie crust.

1.  In a cast iron skillet, brown the sausage and crumble. Remove from pan and set aside.
2.  Add a small amount of olive oil to skillet and saute the onions and garlic till almost translucent.
3.  Add the potatoes and carrots to skillet and brown till heated through.
4.  In a medium bowl, mix eggs, evaporated milk, milk.  Add seasonings.  Shred cheese into wet mixture.
5. Once potatoes and carrots are heated through, remove them from skillet.  
6.  Add a little more olive oil to skillet if needed.  Add approximately 2 handfuls of fresh spinach to the skillet. Cook spinach till wilted.
7.  Add spinach to the bottom of the pie crust. Put the potatoes, carrots, and sausage on top.  Pour the wet mixture on top. (DO NOT OVER FILL) I put a cookie sheet underneath to catch the overflow.  I also used my small ramekins to cook the extra wet mixture.
8.  Cook quiche on 325 degrees till done.

This ended up being really good.  I am using the little ramekins servings as lunch this week with a salad. 

Sunday FAIL

All grand plans failed today.  I ended up taking a small nap instead of being productive.  I guess when you have to sleep you have to sleep. 

Quiche is cooling and I am honestly not sure if it is going to be edible.  At least I used most of the leftovers in it so if it isn't edible I didn't waste much food.  Update:  It was good!!  I'll do a separate post for the recipe.  Yummy and it will probably be what I eat until I head to the store on Wednesday.

Clothes and accessories are ready for work tomorrow, bag, lunch and other office stuff are about ready to go.  I guess we will see what is to transpire tomorrow.  I am going to go into it with an open mind and just see what happens.  If anything I have a few things I can do.  I only plan on being there from 9-4. 

So much to do this week!  I have gotten the calendar and the to do list set up and I m ready to rock!!

Simple Sunday

After a slight fall on me face yesterday in terms of attitude and goals, I decided it pick my self up and get back in the game. 

I'm getting the house picked up today, going for my 3 miles in a few hours, getting back on the study wagon and getting ready to go to a real office tomorrow!!  I am working up a new quiche recipe in my head and I am going to be trying that out later tonight.  If all goes well I will try and remember to take pictures and post it later tonight.

I am also going to hold off on my menu until Tuesday night. The store circulars come out on Tuesday night and I have started to use those to decide what I am making.  Yet another way I am trying to save a little money here and there.

I think once I do all of that I will curl up in my chair tonight and watch a few episodes of West Wing and relax!!

Friday, January 22, 2010

Brownie Binge

Thank you Ina Garten for giving me a recipe that would allow me to satisfy the PMS/stress chocolate urge.  I  started with the brownie pudding recipe and didn't cook it in the water bath and then let it cook longer and it turned into a yummy brownie.  Had I known it was going to work I would have thrown some walnuts in for crunch but it was still perfect for the craving.  It was also good to cook it tonight so I can take it to the parentals tomorrow and get it out of the house. 


I had an interesting talk with my mother today and found out some interesting things.  Turns out when The Boy moved, that really thought I would be moving up there and were talking about actually moving to be closer to us.  I was told today that if I moved anywhere they would more than likely move up closer to me within a year or two. Some would be upset about that but I was actually happy about it.  It made me feel like my safety net would be with me wherever I go.  So yes, I am actively looking for jobs up where The Boy is....not to be with him but because even before I met him, I dreamed of moving up there and working.  It has been a dream since I was in middle school.

Ok, I still have writer's block and I am just not into writing today.  I really need to get back into my creative writing roots and work on better posts.  But tonight, I think I will finish watching TV and head to bed early. 

Thursday, January 21, 2010

Deep Thoughts by someone who needs sleep and chocolate

What do you do when you come to the realization that the career you thought you had and what you thought you were working towards isn't?

I know that it is just the monthly hormones, or I hope it is, that are making me think this but damn. 

Ok, PMS is apparently going to kick my ass this month.  I have the already raided the super secret sugar drink stash of Jones Root Beer. I'm craving something like this.





Classic signs.  Now if I could just learn how to handle the signs them I would be good to go.  I guess I did good today and did my 3 miles, ate good so I guess I am due it a little. 

Is it sad when making a list is going to be what cheers me up?  That and taking a hot shower and jumping in bed to read a good book.





Wednesday, January 20, 2010

I love her but damn if I want to be her

Just got off the phone with maternal unit.  DAMN, that woman drives me up the wall. 

You know there are some people who just love to hear themselves talk...well she probably heads up that fan club.  She is hilarious!  Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, OK bye.  She talks and talk and then ok, gotta go bye. 

She also sucks at the guilt trip; either that or maybe I am just a self centered daughter who could give a shit and doesn't want to drive 45 minutes away to fix a computer just because she has a 11-3 lunch and it makes it hard for her.  I just can't see doing that and cutting into my day of Food Network, sleep, working out, and laundry.   In all seriousness, I have a shit ton of school work to do and need to get cracking on those 6 job contacts this week. 

I had another day of being domestic.  I must say, when I become gainfully employed again I am going to miss running my errands during the middle of the day.  It is nice not being hurried at the grocery store, being able to take my clothes to the cleaners and not HAVE TO pick them up the same day. 

However, in employed's corner, it will be nice to be able to have discretionary funds again.  I desperately need a hair cut and a pedicure.  I also would like to get a gym membership so I can start working out on my non-run days and mix it up a little. 

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Happy Tuesday!

What a great day.  It was another window open day and I got one more room knocked out.  I just finished dinner (I am changing up the menu to different days but still cooking what is on there), and sitting in my chair enjoying the breeze coming in the window.

I ended up doing 3 miles today (walk/run) and it felt great.  I ate good all day and really it was a no drama boring day.   I wish I could afford a gym membership right now.  I need to find something to do on my off days.  I guess I will pull out the DVDs and do those to get started. 

Tomorrow should be a little better since I need to run errands and do the weekly store run.

Damn, I hate having writer's block! 

Monday, January 18, 2010

What Make the dysfunctional fun

So the last post was way serious.  I thought it might be good to list some of the lighter things about me.

-  I have a thing for the color purple.  No, not the movie, the color.  The crazy thing is I never thought I did.  If you ask me I will tell you I don't really like it. Yea, I am lying to myself I love it and it's as close to pink as I will get.

-  I cuss my cat in German yet I really don't know German.  No seems to be the word we use most in this house so one night I sat here and said no to her in every language I could think of until she responded...German it was!

-  Speaking of cussing, I cuss like a sailor, a really good sailor too. :)

-  My Texas accent is proportionate to the amount of alcohol I consume.  The more I drink the more it comes out.

-  I don't eat artificial sweeteners.  For the longest I was a Diet Coke junkie and then I decided to go cold turkey.  Let me just say DAMN it's like coming off of crack.  But I have been clean for a while and now if I eat anything that has it in it I can taste it and it is nasty.  The hardest part was not drinking my Starbucks without it.  Yea I know I can use full sugar and all that but.....

-  If artificial sweeteners are like crack then sugar is like speed and thus I REALLY limit the amount of processed sugar I eat.  Oh you knew it was coming.  I try to eat as clean as possible.  Agave nectar, honey, succant, and all that new age BS.  I know it seems stupid but I actually can tell a difference.  Notice thought I said TRY.  I still crave sweets like no ones business but I try to stay good as long as possible and then binge once a month.  Donuts are ALWAYS off limits.

-  I am not a good house keeper.  My house isn't like Hoarder's bad, in fact it is relatively clean but it is hard for me to do it.

-  I love to dress up but I love my sweats and pjs too.  If I am at home, I am in  the slob gear.

-  I have a growing collection on Chucks aka Converse.  But only lo-tops. I used to wear them to work when I worked a job that I could wear jeans to.  Now I keep them out of the office and only for the weekends.  Oh, growing up is a bitch!

-  I am not in love with Sex in the City.  I never had cable when it was on so I never watched it.  I have watched a few episodes and the movie but I just never flipped over it.

-  I have no pictures in my house up.  I even have an empty frame sitting on my coffee table! 

-  I might not like shopping too much but I LOVE surfing online for clothes...I could probably get to enjoy shopping but I am scared I will like it too much.

What makes the dysfunctional functional or more about me.

You know those little boxes where you are asked to describe yourself or write about yourself?  Well they scare the holy terror out of me.  Not because I have so much to say about myself and a little box just doesn’t do it justice.  More because I have no idea what to say about myself; dare I say I had no idea who I was?

It felt like for the better part of my life, I was trying to find myself while I was living in a world where everyone knew who they were and what they wanted.  Thinking that only made me more clueless and thinking that I should have a definitive statement on who I was.  Every day without this knowing who I was seemed to make me feel less and less like a valued member of society.

Granted, I didn’t sit in a chair for all this time and ponder this thought.  I had a life to lead, responsibilities to handle, expectations to meet, you know, the things that we fill our days with.  In my “adult” life, I got married, I got divorced, I had 3 more long term relationships, 3 more not so pretty break ups, lost 2 amazing grand parents, had 5 jobs, 3 change of addresses, 4 cars, 2 cats, and 1 dog.  I smoked, stopped, started, stopped, started, stopped, started, and stopped. I went from 115 pounds to close to 200 and then lost some, gained some, lost some again.   I went from wondering how I was going to make rent to feeling like I could buy anything I wanted to wondering if I had saved enough for the rainy day fund everyone talks about.  You could say I lived life and took care of what I needed to do.

A funny thing happened in this living life.  All the time I was bemoaning myself for not knowing who I was, I was finding myself.  I had to realize that the person I was might not be who everyone else was and that was ok.

In a nutshell I am a contradiction.  I honestly think more people are contradictions than they lead you to believe.

I love music.  It makes me happy.  I love creating music and I love listening to it. I like classical, jazz, classic rock, oldies, 80’s hair bands, 90’s grunge and alternative, some current harder rock and alternative, some 90’s country, selected soul.  I do not like rap, hip-hop, techno, teeny bopper music, main stream hits of today, fake rock of today. I like going to the symphony but I am scared to go alone so I rarely go.  I keep telling myself to just go and one day soon I hope to get up the courage to do it. One of the best dates I ever had was when someone took me to the symphony as a treat.

I like photography.  I like to take pictures but not of people, especially people I know.  I prefer to take pictures of nature and objects.  I like the use of shadow and color.  I like to look at pictures that make me feel calm and relaxed.  As much as I like pictures, I have none in my house.  None of me, none that I have taken, I have nothing.  I blame it on being lazy and scared to put anything up.

While on the lazy and scared thing, I have to say I am extremely lazy and let my fears get in the way of doing a lot.   I am not really sure it is pure lazy as opposed to being scared to start something and not being able to do it perfect.  Yes, I am a lazy scared perfectionist.  That is a hard combination to be.  I am trying to lose all of them but mostly the scared part. My fears keep me out of a lot of things.  I am scared I am going to make a fool of myself and everyone will look down on me.  I am scared I will say the wrong thing and everyone remembers, I am scared I will make people unhappy or mad, I am scared no one likes me, I am scared of what people think.  I also have a tendency to remember everything stupid, wrong, bad, or embarrassing that I do and I relive it over and over in my head.  I am scared probably more of me replaying things and feeling bad as I am of what other people think. 

I like to cook.  I can get lost in cooking and making up new recipes.  I have a hard time cooking when it is just me but I am learning to freeze and reuse.  Baking is something I am not as good at but I am trying.  I usually only really bake in the winter months however I might try to find some lighter baking things for the summer months.  I also try to cook without the use of processed sugars.  Not as easy as it seems but very well worth it.

I hate to shop but love clothes and accessories.  Probably more it is the money and weight thing than anything for why I don’t like to shop.  But, I am learning to enjoy it more, it just costs me money because I have learned the value of timeless pieces even if they cost. I loathe places like TJ Maxx and Marshalls.  I honestly don’t like Macys that much either.  Stores that feel crowded overwhelm me and it is too much.  If I have to do major shopping, which I do about twice a year, I always use personal shoppers.  It is just easier for me.

Why is it easier for me?  For the same reason you NEVER see a picture of me taken of anything below the collar bone.  I am a lot too well endowed and it really frustrates me.  I am so ready to get rid of them I just have to figure out how insurance will pay for it.  Let’s put it this way, I am not overweight, I am 5’8”, I wear a size 14 which I feel is completely normal.  I wear a 38G.  It bites.  It makes me feel fatter than I am and I think it is all anyone looks at. 

I am not athletic and have never been.  Hand to eye coordination with me does not exist.  You have seen the shows of the spaz who has a ball thrown at him and then after it hits him, he puts his hands up to catch it, that’s me.  I am really trying to be better.  I push myself out of my comfort zone to try new things that involve some athletic ability.  I am more excited about getting into running.  I have tried and had a few missteps but this time it feels better.

I am sure this “About Me” post is a work in progress just like I feel we are all works in progress who evolve all the time.  At least this is start of trying to explain myself and who I am. 

Sunday, January 17, 2010

Weekly Menu

The goal of this week is to try out a few more recipes that will allow me to create a few meals out of one cooking.  I have a feeling life is going to get a little more crazy in the coming weeks but I still need to keep cooking and eating at home (4 pounds down this month just by cooking at home!) . Everything I cook this week I am going to try to freeze some so I have it ready to go. I am also going to try something new and cook out of only 1 or 2 of my magazines and cookbooks.  Time to try out something new.

Sunday:  Girls Dinner - Cheese!!  I am bringing Fried Cheese with a few modifications from the recipe. I will post when I finish.

Monday: Spaghetti with homemade sauce - Healthy Cooking, Dec/Jan 2010, p. 47

Tuesday: Crock Pot "Brisket" w/venison (freeze left overs)

Wednesday:  Roast Chicken  - Cooking Light, Jan/Feb 2010, p.180 (use new potatoes and carrots instead of squash)

Thursday: Mediterranean pasta w/shrimp and scallops - Healthy Cooking, Dec/Jan 2010 p. 64

Friday: Vegetable soup (WW 0 point soup - getting ready for getting back to work and thinking I should keep some on hand at the office)

Saturday: Enchilada Lasagna - Healthy Cooking, Dec/Jan 2010 p. 48 (freeze half of the recipe)

Saturday, January 16, 2010

Interview outcome

Well the coffee date has come and gone.  Verdict....NEXT. 

I went into it with preconceived notions of how this guy would be and my notions did not disappoint. While I do believe that going into a situation thinking it will be bad only makes it come out bad, I promise I went into this with an open mind. 

There are things that are taboo on a first date.  Subjects such as religion, political views, feelings on children, and exes.  However, all of those subject were broached on this date and I was not the one to bring them up.  Needless to say we had VERY different viewpoints.  There were a few times I actually wanted to yell at him and tell him that he was selfish, ignorant, and I thought he was debating just to debate and take the other side of the argument.  There were times I wanted to just walk out.  It lasted a whole hour and a half and it felt like 3.  Funny, I apparently had my fill of the BS of debate for the sake of debate with The Boy and didn't even want to put up with it this time around.  I must have learned with him how to spot someone who is self centered and just like to hear himself debate just to debate.  Yea, not willingly going there again.

As much as I hate to say this, I am starting to really wonder if now guys who are 32+ who have no kids and who have never been married have some inherent flaw. Everyone of them I have dated I can definitely tell why they are still single.  Oh, I know that some of them are normal and probably have just been focused on career and whatnot but I have yet to find them.

Friday, January 15, 2010

Ask and you shall recieve

I got jolted out of my sleep by the door bells ringing.  Yes, plural.  The builders of my house decided it would be fun to put two doorbells in just for shits and grins since one is integrated with the intercom. 

I almost did not answer but they kept pestering.  I threw on my cutest mismatched shirt and PJ bottoms and ran to the door.  I ALMOST missed my laptop delivery!!  My baby is back and all is well with the world.

In other news, I went with the girls today to look for veils for my friends wedding. Let me tell you, I could have tried on every dress in that store.  OMG!!!  I seriously am in major wedding envy now.  Think my MBA would translate well into being a bridal consultant? 

Date tomorrow afternoon.  No surprise, the coffee date.  The coffee date is like the pre-date date; the interview to see if you measure up to get the date event.  I have some studying to do so I actually might get there early just to try and get some studying in.  What can I say, I like to be the first there so they walk onto my turf.  I do that at work as well.  Must be a character trait.  

Like the new layout?  I am still tweaking it but it's getting there.

I miss my baby

I really miss my Air.  I hope it comes back soon.  My spare craptop just isn't helping me feel creative.

Have I mentioned lately how much dating and I do not get along?  I had a pretty good conversation with a guy tonight and we made plans to meet up Saturday.  But there were things he said that I just didn't agree with.  While I know that no one ever agrees on all of the same things, what things should you agree on?  And I know I am talking about as things progress. When is it a deal breaker if you have different views on money, family, and decorating (yes, I have had someone tell me that nice furniture was a waste and hand me downs were just fine...yea when I was in college!)  Oh well, I guess it is good to know that I am still learning.

Well I figure that a date on Saturday calls for a splurge of a hair cut.  I worked a day from my mom so that money should cover the hair cut.  It should make me feel a little better about myself right now as well. As long as they don't screw it up! I just wish I had a better pair of blue jeans.  Oh well,I can make do with the ones I have and if there is a second date, then that one is after work and no jeans. :) 



These are growing on me....

Maybe the fact that it is the Stephie pump is a good reason.   It just looks like a shoe that would be good in my collection...especially since I did the unthinkable and got rid of some of the collection. 

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Resolution....SUCCESS!

I am such a dork!!!  All it took to get me in a good mood was a check list on my dry erase board of things I needed to get gone.  I will admit I lived the last 5 years of my work life with a daily check list and I was having withdrawals.

I ended up at the grocery store and price shopped my little butt off today baby.  I stalked the aisles looking for good food for me on the cheap.  If you know me I am a complete foody.  I can spend on my own easily over $100 a week on food just because it looks good.  So to have to put my self on a $100 a MONTH budget and you can see where my challenge is.  But I found the deals and proudly walked up to the cashier and watched the screen like a hawk.  Of course, the cashier missed my main sales item and actually looked offended when I called her out on it!  I am sorry lady, did you not see that everything in my cart rang up as some sort of special price, sure I you think that I shouldn't be bitching because my total food bill was $28.  but damnit, I know it should be $22 and I need that six bucks for my cheese dish on Sunday.

So, I saved money, handled conflict without crying like a baby, cooked dinner, went for a 45 minute walk/jog, successfully flirted with a new interest, and kept my temper all day.  I am also working on my 2nd book this month so that is a good thing as well.

And tomorrow I can dress up!!  I have a business appointment.  Woohoo!!!

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Resolution FAIL

Safe to say that today was not the best of days.  I think I am getting a bit of the unemployment blues.  I am not going to go as far as to say that I miss the office that I got out of but I am going to say I am starting to miss my life.

I actually get to get out of the house tomorrow...to run errands.  I have to pick up the dry cleaning of clothes I not longer get to wear because I am unemployed.Oh sure I can wear my work clothes I guess but really, how practical is it to wear a cute dress and heels around the house.  When I start getting that dressed up to go get the mail, some one needs to shoot me.  I miss going out to lunch, going out for drinks, shopping, my life.


One good thing in this craptastic life I currently lead is that I am so ahead on my school work it isn't even funny.  If they would open up all the modules, I would be finished by the end of the month.  Oh god I need a life!!!!! 

I keep telling myself that I am making the choice to not spend money, to be practical and watch my expenses.  I shouldn't be mad at anyone because I am making the choice.  The girl saying that in my head usually has the shit kicked out of her by the girl yelling at everyone around me who doesn't have to worry about money right now and who can't understand why I can't just pop down the tollway (beginning to end and back) each day to just hang out.  Seriously!!  The gas and toll would kill me if I did that every day. She is beating up the people who screwed her out of her year of vacation pay she had saved up (oh yea, they did hence the reason I am very bitter). She is crying because she is worried that she is going to have to dip into her savings to live and will be losing a lot of what she worked for these past few years.  She is crying because she wants to go out to lunch and out at night with her friends but knows that it is either going out or mortgage.  She is crying because she knows she has her friend's wedding in a few months and isn't really sure she can afford to go to that as well as can't afford to go to Boston in March with her family when she has been wanting to go back for 18 years. She is yelling at people who think that because she doesn't have a job she should just be able to run errands, do odd jobs, and literally have asked her if she wants to be their maid to make extra money (hello, since when did my life become the story line to "Other People's Money").   That girl just needs a drink. 

Damn, I have to get out of this funk.  I can't believe I just wrote all of that.

Monday, January 11, 2010

Weekly Menu

Without my laptop, I have been off my blogging game for the last few days.   I haven't wanted to come and sit in my office and blog at nights like I should. But today I decided I couldn't live like a college kid on semester break anymore.  It worked great that my class actually began today as well!  I am doing my must do work at set times during the day and not laying around watching TV minus Food Network (I completely screwed myself on  my last post....only that network has been out since Friday...karma always kicks my ass). Hopefully this will also help me not get behind in school.

Anyhoo, without further ado (I really wish I could continue this train of thought in the style of Seuss), time to figure out what the heck I am eating this week!

Monday - yummy leftovers
Tuesday - tamales with beans and rice
Wednesday - veggie burger and roasted potatoes
Thursday - broccoli beef
Friday - Chicken with Lemon Mushroom sauce and salad
Saturday - BBQ chicken with roasted potatoes and salad
Sunday - NO CLUE!!  Dinner party to go to and I have to bring something using cheese.  The possibilities are endless but I am overwhelmed with choices.

Thursday, January 7, 2010

The best way to break a bad mood...

Is to turn everything off.  I called the parentals tonight and instead of getting a break I got told how I just need to get over it.  No shit Sherlock.  Like I don't know that.  I didn't need a lecture on how my mood needs to improve. I promise you that doesn't make it automajically get better.  If anything it pisses me off more.  As a result, I turned off my phone, turned off my messenger, and I am about to turn off my computer.  I am going to turn off the TV, get ready for bed, hop in a read a book and escape to somewhere else. 

No alarm clocks tomorrow, no dealing with my phone ringing and waking me up, and no dealing with anything annoying.  The only thing I have to do tomorrow is pick up a loaner computer, turn mine in, and go splurge on a new book. 

Good night all, until I decide to rejoin society.

Losing my mind

I am seriously losing my mind.  I think being stuck in this freaking house and is about to make me tear out my hair.   I am going stir crazy and I don't want to do anything that I should be doing.  I have slept all I can, it is too cold to get out and do anything, and I am just getting pissy.  I need to snap out of this mood and just move on.  I say today is a resolution FAIL.  My phone rang at 7:30 and woke me up so I started the day cussing.  The only productive thing I did was clean off my computer so I could turn it in and get it fixed.  I still haven't figured out what I am going to do without a computer.  Honestly, I should probably enjoy the break.  In the back of my mind I know what is wrong and I am just not ready to face it yet, but let's just say that the next few weeks will probably not be easy on me and my family.

Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Thanks Food Network for screwing me

Let me start of with saying I love cooking.  Something about being able to get out a super sharp knife and whack at innocent food just screams stress relief to me.  That and the super amazing things that come out of the kitchen soothe me in my craziest of day (as witnessed by the growth of my butt during super stress times). 

Today has been the day of errands I tried to run but couldn't.  All I did successfully was take in my dry cleaning and finally take my November expense check to the bank.  I had 5 things I got out to do today all so I could stay home tomorrow and curl up and do nothing.  It looks like I will be out and about tomorrow.  Boo!!

First errand was taking my baby to the Apple store since I might have popped the lid partially off this morning. Word to the wise, hearing your Air make a cracking sound it is NEVER a good thing.  Off I trecked to Willow Bend only to be told good new/bad news.  Good news...it can be fixed and it MIGHT not cost you anything.  Bad new, we have to send it out to be fixed.  Wait, you gotta do what!!  I have 3 years worth of important data on here.  Ok, so maybe just a little bit of important data and more really embarrassing pictures.  Great. Since I need to clean off somethings and do have some things I need to do today on my computer, I have to go back tomorrow to let them send it in.  Double great. I just hope my old HP still works or that I can borrow one of the numerous laptops my friend has.

Off I go to Home Depot to get faucet covers for the outside faucets.  I know, I am great at advanced planning. They are out and I went ahead and assumed if they were out, everyone around suburbia would be out. Time to do some redneck engineering in the neighborhood. Sorry HOA if I mess up the pretty community (wait the porta potty down the street at the construction site kinds screws that one). So I am going to be wrapping them in towels and covering that with trash bags and duct tape. 

Finally, I head to the grocery store to stock up on food so I don't starve to death. Sunday dinner with the parentals is a family recipe that just happens to use ham hocks to flavor the dumpling juice.  I have NEVER had a problem finding this.  It is an ugly scary piece of meat/fat that always seems to be hanging around.  Yea, granted I live in the South but I also live in the burbs where there was a time I couldn't find couscous but could find every type of peanut butter you could imagine. Turns out, everyone got ham hocks to put in beans and it is a low priority to reorder.  So thanks Food Network for showcasing how to use this hunk of meat and for putting these recipes on your website so everyone can try them out.  Now, I have to get out hunt this thing down.  No sleeping in enjoying the heater tomorrow for me.


Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Lazy Daisy

As the weather gets colder I am getting lazier and lazier.  My brain must be getting cold to because I am having a total writer's block. 

I have to get off my ass and start doing SOMETHING this week!  I completely have been slacking on getting rid of crap at the house so now I can't claim that it is trashed because I am cleaning out for the new year...now it is just trashed.   Hmmm, thinking....  EUREKA!!  I need some happy hour fuel to get me going.  A night out with friends laughing my ass off and drinking will always get me moving. 

It happy news, I never have to set foot in hell again (Ok, well the office hell that is). I dropped off my keys, got my check and gave them the big F you.  Well, maybe I just wish I would have given them the big F you but a girl can dream.  They tried to pick my brain more on how to actually run the business and I just gave them a look like they had to be kidding and walked out.  All I can say now is NEXT!

Monday, January 4, 2010

Purge Day 2

2009 tried to come back in and I had a heck of a time shutting it out.  But I did and I am damn proud of that. 

Today I decided to work on my office and get it cleaned up so I could start working in it and doing my schoolwork in there again.  The end result was even more stuff to give away and a full recycling bin.   Yea for the environment, crap for me and the fact that it won't be emptied again until Friday.  I wish I lived in a suburbia where neighbors talked to each other.  If I did maybe I could see if the people next door who never recycle would let me borrow their bin.  Instead I am going to have to cram as much as I can in and push it down.  Once it is 110% full, it is going to have to go into more bags to put in the bin after it is empty.

Ah, you say I am getting overly pessimistic in the amount of stuff I am getting rid of and I might not have that more left?  NOPE. I still haven't finished the office, the guest bedroom, the hall linen closet, the coat closet, the laundry room, the kitchen, and more in my bedroom. Oops, almost forgot, the mountains of my stuff I had at the office that is now in my front hall and garage that much be gone through ASAP.  Once that is done then I will khow where I start on getting stuff in the house that I actually like.

I have been following my goals and my new budget and have not spent a dime all weekend.  Even when I was craving fajitas, I didn't do it because it wasn't in my budget. I guess I have to add that on to the parents part of the weekly dinner or I need to find a recipe.

Wow, without the puppies here, I am getting tired! 

Saturday, January 2, 2010

Weekly Menu

This week will be the first week of my new schedule for this month. It will also be my first week on my new budget. Monday finish my contract assignment and be done once and for all with old job, Tuesday and Wednesday do some work for my mom, Thursday and Friday work on my certification exam studying. In the afternoons, keep working on the house.

Sunday...dinner at the parentals
Monday...black eye peas, salad and corn bread
Tuesday...Pork chops, mashed potatoes, and green beans (third times a charm!)
Wednesday...tamales, rice, and black beans
Thursday...Pork chops and salad
Friday...pizza and salad
Saturday...tomato soup and grilled cheese

Purge Day One

Why does it always seem like when you are trying to get your life clean and organized, it just gets messier?

There are currently 11 bags of clothes, a coffee table, a chair, an end table (soon to be two), 2 boxes, and a bird cage sitting in my empty dining room. Trash day was yesterday but I already have a trash cart two-thirds full. There is a bag of stuff I have borrowed from my parents that I am sending back as well. I literally might have to sleep on the couch tonight because my bed is covered with clothes and stuff to go through.

The rewards of my efforts you ask? All cabinets and closets in my bedroom and master bath are cleaned out and look great. I know I have done a ton of work today but I just can't see it right now. When it all gets done (projected for the middle of the month...yes I am cleaning that thoroughly) it will be amazing and I can finally start trying to get this place decorated and feeling like my own.

As a side note, I am pretty dorky but it made me squeal like a little girl when I saw one of my dresses on the mannequin on a commercial for What Not to Wear. Don't worry the dress was a what to wear example. Now of course I have to start watching again to see how they accessorized it!

Friday, January 1, 2010

2010 Goals

Since 2009 sucked so bad, I am going to try to set some goals for 2010. 12 goals in 12 months. Now, this doesn’t mean I will have a goal for each month, it just means that by this time next year I hope to have all of these goals done. This will give me something personal to work on and not just get wrapped up in my next job like I did the last one.

1. Read 24 non school books in 2010. This breaks down to 2 books a month or a book every two weeks. I need to remember to take time each day for myself and reading will help me get back into that. I might read books to help me with work, to help me with networking, or just a trashy romance or chick lit book, but I will read more than school books.

2. Cook more. I plan on creating a menu each week (and following it) and including one new recipe each week. This doesn’t mean that I am only going to cook one new thing a week, but I am going to try a new special recipe each week. This is also going to help me plan my week and stick with my general weekly plan. Once a month I am going to attempt a recipe from my Greek cook book.

3. Clean and keep the house clean. I am NOT a neat person by nature. Cleaning does not provide me with the Zen that some people get. Case in point, my parents both worked a ton of hours had a weekly housekeeper to clean the house and my room was the room that she skipped over. Not because my parents told her to but because it was just that bad. So it is time to be an adult and keep it clean.

4. Network, network, network. Being the introvert that I am, this is a biggie for me. This is really a needed item since my new role is now encompassing marketing and ultimately getting new clients. YIKES! Any suggestions on how to do this would be greatly appreciated.

5. Practice my creative projects more. I will start working on my photography more. I would also like to start getting some of them processed so I can hang them in the house. I also am going to make a conscious effort to start writing again and putting more thoughts into my written word off of the blog and on. This will also help me with my stress level as I start a new job.

6. Finally make the house feel like a home. I have lived here for almost 3 years and I have nothing on the walls, no decorations out to speak of. Nothing is organized and I don’t’ feel 100% happy in my house.

7. Run. I keep letting this one slide and I am tired of no being able to just get out there and start. I am going to do the couch to 5k program and sign up for a 5k within the first 6 months of the year.

8. Become an adult in terms on my health. This is a pretty big one. I need to lost XX number of pounds. Not just for my physical health by for my mental health as well. Being the analytical person I am, I figured out that I will have to lose X pounds each week of the year an exactly how many calories that was. Talk about breaking it down into easier steps. I also need to make a few Dr. appointments I have put off mainly because I am a wuss when it comes to pain.

9. Be a better daughter. I know that my dad misses me and does better when I am around. My family has never had any real traditions, but I am instituting Sunday dinner as a family tradition. Whether it is at my house or theirs. I want to get together every Sunday for dinner and catching up.

10. Graduate. Focus on school so I can get out by December 2010 so I can focus on other things in my life (JL, travel, etc.).

11. Be happy. I am known for being the moody pessimist and let things get to me. Not anymore. I am going to wake up each day with a smile and see how far it gets me.

12. Give back. I do donate through the year, but I think that you can’t just give money and think you have done your part.