Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Resolution FAIL

Safe to say that today was not the best of days.  I think I am getting a bit of the unemployment blues.  I am not going to go as far as to say that I miss the office that I got out of but I am going to say I am starting to miss my life.

I actually get to get out of the house tomorrow...to run errands.  I have to pick up the dry cleaning of clothes I not longer get to wear because I am unemployed.Oh sure I can wear my work clothes I guess but really, how practical is it to wear a cute dress and heels around the house.  When I start getting that dressed up to go get the mail, some one needs to shoot me.  I miss going out to lunch, going out for drinks, shopping, my life.

One good thing in this craptastic life I currently lead is that I am so ahead on my school work it isn't even funny.  If they would open up all the modules, I would be finished by the end of the month.  Oh god I need a life!!!!! 

I keep telling myself that I am making the choice to not spend money, to be practical and watch my expenses.  I shouldn't be mad at anyone because I am making the choice.  The girl saying that in my head usually has the shit kicked out of her by the girl yelling at everyone around me who doesn't have to worry about money right now and who can't understand why I can't just pop down the tollway (beginning to end and back) each day to just hang out.  Seriously!!  The gas and toll would kill me if I did that every day. She is beating up the people who screwed her out of her year of vacation pay she had saved up (oh yea, they did hence the reason I am very bitter). She is crying because she is worried that she is going to have to dip into her savings to live and will be losing a lot of what she worked for these past few years.  She is crying because she wants to go out to lunch and out at night with her friends but knows that it is either going out or mortgage.  She is crying because she knows she has her friend's wedding in a few months and isn't really sure she can afford to go to that as well as can't afford to go to Boston in March with her family when she has been wanting to go back for 18 years. She is yelling at people who think that because she doesn't have a job she should just be able to run errands, do odd jobs, and literally have asked her if she wants to be their maid to make extra money (hello, since when did my life become the story line to "Other People's Money").   That girl just needs a drink. 

Damn, I have to get out of this funk.  I can't believe I just wrote all of that.

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